I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
