I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize