You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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