is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Randomize
