why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
