Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
The struggles of a small town man whore
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
