she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
