hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
How does one acquire holy water?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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