gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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