You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
