Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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