Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
