I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
