I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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