Quick, to the slutcave!
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Randomize
