I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
The ass gains better be worth it
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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