Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
