My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize