If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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