I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
