I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
