we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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