i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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