oh fat girl friday strikes again...
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You've changed since you got that strap on
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
