CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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