I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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