I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
