Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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