i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
