Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
