My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize