You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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