Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
