I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
her vagine was all disorganized.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
