would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
