Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
