You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
