she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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