Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
