I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
