Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
