Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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