Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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