never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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