do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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