I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize