i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
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