the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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