I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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