You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize