Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize