He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
We are two peas in an std pod
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
What a dumb baby whore.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Randomize
