I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
